When You Just Want to Explode

Life can be frustrating. People can be infuriating.

What do you do when you’re fed up?

When someone or something has crossed the line?

When they’ve stepped on your last nerve?

What do you do when you just want to explode?

In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus commended “the meek.” But what exactly is meekness? Meekness is far from weakness. Weakness is the absence of strength. Meekness is strength under control. The opposite of meekness is reactive, harsh, intimidating, rage, explosiveness… When we get angry and “lose our temper,” we’re doing the exact opposite of what Jesus calls us to do.

I know. Those of us who have or had bad tempers have lots of excuses. It’s just how we’re wired. We inherited our tempers. It was normal in our family of origin. Maybe normal in our current home or workplace. Our friends do it. It’s how we get people to listen to us or how we get things done.

But Jesus calls us to meekness rather than rage.

Jesus is the vine, and we are the branches (John 15:4). We produce much fruit when we abide in Him (John 15:5). That fruit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23). As our focus drifts from Jesus, we produce less of that fruit. That means that our angry outbursts, rage, emotional fits, harsh reactions… serve as reliable indicators that we are not abiding in Jesus.

So, what do we do?

First, let’s be clear about what will not work. Trying really hard to be more patient, kind, gentle, or self-controlled will not work. Without Jesus, your best efforts will be unsustainable. About bearing fruit, Jesus tells us “apart from me you can do nothing” (John 15:5).

The key is to reconnect with Jesus. How does one do that when angry? Perhaps you’re too entangled in your situation to word a personal prayer. I’ve been there. Perhaps your heart is beating out of your chest. I’ve been there too. So, what do you do?

One word: worship.

Consider how worship affects you. Does it bring you joy? Peace? Comfort? I bet when you’re really worshipping your blood pressure goes down and your breathing slows. Anger and frustration can make us increasingly self-focused. Yet, worship turns our attention to our Lord and Savior. When we’re angry, we want to be heard. But when we worship, our focus shifts from wanting to be heard to wanting to hear from God.

When we listen, God tends to speak; and when God speaks, things happen. On the other hand, our own angry words tend to bring more regret than anything. When I’ve paused and sought to worship before reacting to something frustrating, I’ve walked away with another perspective and found great peace and joy in what God says to me in the most trying situations.

John Crosby